What went really well?
Romantic: My relationship with Dan grew leaps and bounds in the past three months. We were always good, but we’re getting even better with time. I have been humbled more than once, learning that my communication skills aren’t always as good as I would like to think. But that is a positive, because I can work on it. And I have more control than I think, of my perspective that is.
Fitness and health: I’ve started experimenting with different yoga classes, Dan and I have been hiking on and off, I signed up for a gym membership and have been going at least once a week, I’ve been cooking more for my lunches, I restarted my habit of breakfast… started and have stuck with a flossing habit which has been a little thing on my mind for years now.
Hobbies: I’ve made progress on my black, white and gold blanket. I bought a bigger instax (again) and started taking instant pictures again. I was feeling cramped with the mini and my bank felt broken by impossible film/polaroid. So the instax wide has worked out. I have been staying on my pictures, keeping them organized in my iphoto, being vigilant about deleting unnecessary ones.
Misc: I started giving private booty bounce lessons to a friend that I met through the pole studio I’ve been going to off and on for a few years now. Because of this, I now have a booty bounce 4 week workshop that I’m going to be teaching at the studio! I’m so excited to bring the power of jiggle and loving what is to my friends and some new girls. It’s not Miley twerking nonsense, it’s booty bounce and it’s a whole lot of fun. Really, really excited for that.
My birthday! I’ve been wanting to plan a getaway for my birthday for YEARS and it worked out! Stoked.
What was challenging?
Figuring out what to work on and realizing that good things have happened this past three months. I often feel like I am stagnant, that nothing new is happening, that I’m not doing enough, I’m lazy, boring, unmotivated etc, etc, thank you insecurites. But that’s no true. In fact, just about none of it is true. Maybe the not doing enough is true, but if I had a direction mapped out I’m pretty sure that wouldn’t be the case anymore. The fact of the matter is, I’m not lazy, I wake up pretty early compared to what I use to (SUCCESS, goal met) and I start doing things, they might end up being a lot of chores that don’t have long term affects, BUT, I am doing things. So, the habit won’t have to be switched from doing nothing to doing something, I will just have to switch out some errands and replace them with some tasks that really get me where I want to be going. Challenge? Figuring out where exactly I want to be going, because I want to be going to a lot of places and doing a lot of things.
My other challenge, putting 40+ hours of time into something that doesn’t do anything for my life goals. I know I don’t have them exactly pinned down yet, but they are feelings, and this isn’t at any point feeling like I’m spending the time in a productive way. Work takes up at least a quarter of our week… I want that quarter to be meaningful. Definitely the goal I need to be focusing on. Hard.
What were the biggest lessons I learned?
The biggest lessons I am just starting to learn. The first is to really enjoy it, and write it down. I get so caught up in what I am not doing that I don’t celebrate what I do. It’s time to celebrate, big and small. Maybe then I’ll be even more inclined to accomplish the next steps, or even bigger goals. Or, the best part, enjoy this life.
The second lesson is to focus. I am just starting on this. I know that I need to focus, because it’s hard to keep track of the baby steps I’m making in all different directions. My head feels like it’s spinning quite frequently when I get excited about things. I think the hardest part of focusing on things to me is what to focus on. What’s the correct thing, what’s the habit that will positively affect everything else? Do I stop doing everything else until I get that habit? Does it depend on the size of the habit? Does everything else have to go? Do I focus on the blog, my blanket, finding a job, etc etc etc. But if I focus on the blog will I even have things to post about if I don’t get out or make that blanket. I think a lot, it could be said I think too much. Maybe I’ll find a way to make that work for me in the future.
What are my favorite memories?
- Valentine’s Day
- Booty Bounce competition at Dollhouse (I miss being a go-go)
- Birthday in Palm Springs, going to Calico Mining Town and Pioneer Town with Dan, sitting by the pool, driving through the mountains, walking through the grounds of The Ace, trying to walk the grounds of other hotels but getting deterred by the valets
- Birthday in general, dinner with each family, work lunch, going to the shooting range with my dad, soaking it all in. good vibes.
- Giving private dance instructions, for booty bounce no less. Over the moon about that.
- Santa Monica Pier with Dan. Best date ever and it wasn’t even meant to be a date. I was wearing my favorite outfit, we laughed in the photobooth, played a tiny bit of skee ball and I got a churro. Magic. That night was magic.
Was I honoring my values/ ways of being? How? What might have been lacking?
When I talk to my friends that are going through a hard time or are trying to figure out what direction they want to take next or if the one they are currently on is the right one I talk a lot about trusting the universe and working hard. I haven’t been connecting to that trust lately. That could be part of the reason that I haven’t felt the joy as deep, it could be why I focus on what I’m not doing instead of what I am… I’m not sure, I just know that I need to connect back into that faith, that trust as much as possible, and to also work hard. To believe that these dreams of mine are fully possible and to take any and all steps to get there. To dream a little bigger, to take up more room, to be strong. I want to connect back into that, the feeling of faith and strength. The gym and exercise is helping me with strength and the connection… well, I’ve started writing gratitude down in a journal with my goals and daily delights. I want to remember in a positive way.
I was a bit tense when I started my quarterly review but I was happily surprised with what I found in it. It also helped me so much with what I want from this next quarter. But more on that next post.
Quarterly review questions from Stratejoy How to Conduct a Personal Quarterly Review